OOC; How's My Driving?

[redhairedislandgirl]

I know I haven't been here as long, but I think maybe I've been sufficiently a pest in memos and such to get some sort of feedback? What I'm doing wrong, what I could do better, etc.

Comments

[darkfiraga]

I really like what I've seen of Kairi so far! She's caring and concerned for her bff who is acting like a weirdo, but there's also that sense of "wow no way am I sitting out on the action this time". I had forgotton what a courageous and stubborn girl Kairi is, and you bring it out really well.
Constructive crit-wise, I think she comes off as a little rambunctious? I'm not even sure that's the word I want. Maybe a little too far on the side of "I'm not a girly princess, fuck the police, I'll kick your butt". That might also just be because she came in right before a huge conflict plot went down! I love that you don't make her a fragile damsel like a lot of Kairi players, but I guess I'd like to see more balance between stubborn "I'm not afraid to fight you" Kairi and calm, sweet, friend-making Kairi.
That's p much the only crit I can think of. I really do like how you play her a lot, and I'm glad to have CR and threads with you uwu

[sockalicious]

First of all, it's memes, not memos. You really are new at this, aren't you?

Second, a little advice. Every time I've seen you post or tag anything it's been in this really hideous courier new pink font. Pretty much the only characters who get away with that crap are Homestucks since it's in their canon, and even they get a lot of shit for it. Drop the pink, drop the courier. Just let your comment be in plain, normal, friggin readable font. Different people set their comment reading pages differently according to what's comfortable and easy for them to read, and overriding that so you can have your special snowflake font just looks ridiculous. It also makes it look like you, the mun, about twelve.

Third? Spelling and grammar are your friends. I don't care what you do on your own time, but RP is a written hobby and people expect you to have a decent grasp of written language. A little extra effort to hit those shift keys will go a long way toward making you taggable.

Fourth? You might want to go back and re-play the games, pay attention to how Kairi actually talks and reacts to things. Right now you don't really seem to have much of a grasp of her character, and reading your comments, I don't get any sense that this is actually supposed to be Kairi that you're playing. Work on that. A really good character is identifiable even without icons, by what they say and how they say it.

Just some stuff to work on. But seriously, if you only take one thing away from this comment, please stop using the pink courier new. It just looks like shit.

[redhairedislandgirl]

I guess I only really used the courier and color because I roleplay her in jarjammed? But I'll keep in mind for dear_mun. Sorry about that! And I'm replaying the games at the moment, too! :)

The grammar thing is also supposed to be her quirk! But that probably doesn't make sense in logs, so that's just me being dumb and not realizing the setting? Still, thanks for the critique!

[clumsyjesus]

I was looking at your recent DM post and I do think your Kairi needs some work (although I wouldn't have worded it as harshly as the above crit). I'm not sure how to put it into right words but your Kairi's voice, IDK, feels a little....forced? I get that you're trying to make her badass because Kairi ICly is badass and not a doormat. I think you might be trying a little too hard to make her badass, though? She is a tough lady but she isn't "in-your-face" about it. Also, I find it a little hard to see her saying "I am never talking to Goofy again" (Yeah, I can see her being horrified but I don't think she would go far to say something like that.).

Perhaps you could mellow down her voice a little? I think she's more likely to say something like, "Mun.....why? Why would you make me read something horrible like that?” Okay, that’s not the best example. I’m not saying she has to be submissive and meek (because she’s not, hahaha!) but I guess you could tone down her speech a little? You’re replaying the games and that’ll help a lot! :)

The pink text is understandable, since she’s in a Homestuck game, so I’m not going to crit that. XD

I hope this post doesn't put you off from playing Kairi because that was not my intention. We all make mistakes in RP (me included, orz). I'm sure with a bit of polish and refinement, you will make a great Kairi, so good luck! <3

Um...I hope this is helpful advice? If not, say so and I'll try and word it better or something. Hahaha.

[redhairedislandgirl]

Haha, yeah! I've gotten comments about that before, so I'm working on it atm. The whole aggression thing. This is my first time roleplaying Kairi, so it's still not 100% perfect, but thank you! I agree that I kind of... need to reel it in a little bit.